Make two grins grow where only a grouch was before

I must tell you, my fine and fearless readers, that when I start writing my blog entries, my intent is to write something funny. Really, it’s true. Okay, maybe that war\health insurance analogy post wasn’t an upbeat one but I’ll use the excuse that I’d had a bad day.

Funny is a lot harder to write than I originally thought. I do take a certain amount of pride in the fact that I can usually make people laugh, even in a tense situation. It’s a skill that can sometimes go sideways in professional environments – you gotta time your comments juuuuusssttt right.  The same thing applies to physicians; if you’re going to make them laugh, you’d better time it right.

As I’ve mentioned before, I really like the team of physician’s I’ve chosen to work with. I don’t have a general practitioner because everyone I need is a specialist. And really, what does one call a group of physicians? Group really doesn’t convey the cache’ they deserve. At my house, we fondly refer to them as “a plethora of ‘ologists”.  Plethora is just a fun word to say, and so much more interesting than boring old “group”. And that is part of the reason why I like to make my physician’s laugh – it allows me to absorb the news they impart with a smile.

Some of this “need to be funny” is just my personality. Keeping people happy and laughing makes me feel at ease. I think it also comes from many years of awkward appointments where I was ashamed or uncomfortable and I didn’t know how to “fix” what I was feeling.

I was ten years old when I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. It was 1983 and the way you checked to see how much glucose (sugar) was in your system was to pee on a stick. Three to five times a day. So just imagine – your ten, summer before fifth grade, you’re feeling a bit self conscious already because that’s just what happens when you’re ten and some doctor tells you that you are going to have to pee on a stick, AT SCHOOL! Nope, noooo embarrassment in that situation at all.

Now that I am the parent of a ten year old, I can’t imagine how my parents dealt with me in those early diabetes days. People seemed compelled to say truly terrible things to them such as “You must have given her too much sugar”. That was a common one when I was in hearing distance. Then there was the nurse who pulled them aside to tell them they should prepare themselves because most Type 1’s didn’t live past their teenage years because they couldn’t take care of themselves. As an adult I am aware of how hard my parents worked to keep my diabetes related embarrassments to a minimum. I’m sure it took a lot of energy to make that possible. The least I can do to repay their efforts is to be as comfortable with my illness and physician’s, as possible.

I will spare you embarrassment stories about my first pediatric endocrinologist who is currently in jail for being a pedophile or the endocrinologist I had in college who is world renowned for his research but who screamed at me for having difficult insurance.  The difficulty of dealing with them has lead me to a successful technique for selecting and working with my physicians now.

Yesterday I had an appointment with Dr. Redmond, my podiatrist. We talked about the broken foot that still isn’t healing (and thus results in my wearing the boot cast for another month). Having talked with my other physicians, we agreed that until I have surgery and a kidney transplant my condition will remain the same. With great sincerity he said that he wished there was something more he could do. I gave him a deadpan look and said “Have you considered organ donation?” He let out a big surprised laugh and said that he hadn’t but that he’d look into it. We both walked out of the exam room with a smile. That’s a pretty good way to end a doctor's appointment.